Live with More Clarity, Energy, and Inner Direction
In our last post, we explored the link between purposeful living and longevity. Research shows that people with a strong sense of purpose not only enjoy better emotional health—they also face lower disease risk and may live longer, healthier lives.
But knowing that life purpose matters raises a harder question: How do we actually find it?
That’s not always clear. Many of life’s biggest decisions—career, relationships, where we live—are made before we fully know ourselves. We often choose what’s practical or socially validated. And for a time, that works. But eventually, many of us feel a quiet dissonance. The life we’ve built no longer feels like an expression of who we really are.
The Integrity Shift
Psychologist Brian Little describes this as an “integrity shift”—a transition from striving to be effective toward the deeper need to live in alignment with our core values. Others have echoed this idea:
- Erik Erikson described midlife as a critical turning point between generativity—the drive to contribute meaningfully—and stagnation, a feeling of disconnection or restlessness.
- Abraham Maslow placed self-actualization as a top human need, highlighting the universal desire to live in a way that reflects our fullest potential.
- Gail Sheehy, in New Passages, explored how identity continues to evolve throughout adulthood and coined the idea of a midlife “second adulthood”—a time of potential crisis but also reinvention, when old roles fall away and new ones must be consciously shaped.
Together, these perspectives affirm a powerful truth: personal growth doesn’t stop once we’ve become competent. Over time, the longing to live authentically grows stronger—and more urgent.
Why Resonance Matters – At Any Stage of Life
This search for alignment looks different across life stages, but the core challenge is the same. In young adulthood, achievement is energizing—but without reflection, can lead to paths that later feel limiting. In midlife, the longing for meaning often emerges just as responsibilities peak. And in retirement, the question returns with new urgency: What truly matters now?
At any age, clarity begins by noticing what resonates—not what looks good on paper, but what feels meaningful and alive. Yet we’re rarely taught to pay attention to that.
Tuning Fork Moments
So how do we begin to find purpose in life? By listening for what I call tuning fork moments.
Tuning forks are traditionally used in music and medicine to detect or transmit a pure frequency. When struck, one fork vibrates—and if another fork shares that frequency, it begins to resonate too. No contact is needed. Just alignment.
Life offers us similar signals—moments of internal resonance. They don’t shout, but they hum with quiet clarity. You feel alive, connected. Something inside you says, This is me.
You may have experienced a tuning fork moment when:
- A project completely absorbed your attention
- A conversation sparked something deep and real
- A creative pursuit made time disappear
- You felt part of something larger than yourself
- You thought, I could do this forever
These moments are easy to overlook—but they’re not just uplifting. They’re directional. They help distinguish between what’s filling your time and what’s quietly pointing you toward purpose.
Not All “Buzz” Means Purpose
Tuning Fork Moments vs. Universal Spiritual Experiences
Some moments feel transcendent—standing under the stars, hearing moving music, or being awestruck in nature. These are universal spiritual experiences—emotionally powerful, common to all humanity.
But it is important to distinguish these experiences from tuning fork moments.
A tuning fork moment doesn’t just move you. It connects to your unique calling. It whispers, This is what I’m meant to do.
For example, imagine two people at a live concert. Both are deeply moved. One says, “That was unforgettable,” but doesn’t feel pulled to do anything with it. The other leaves thinking, I need to be around this. I want to perform, teach, create. Same experience—but only one senses direction, not just elevation.
Universal spiritual experiences uplift.
Tuning fork moments point.
Tuning In: How to Work with These Moments
To turn these moments into guidance, try this simple process:
- Reflect: Look back on times when you felt fully engaged. What were you doing? Who were you with?
- Capture: Write them down. Even short notes can help anchor them.
- Track: Keep a “tuning fork journal.” Record experiences that spark energy, curiosity, or peace.
- Notice Patterns: Over time, you’ll see themes—core values, interests, environments, and ways of being that consistently ring true.
If we choose to pay attention, our tuning fork moments can become our compass to find our purpose in life, rather than just a set of passing feelings. Upon reflection, they can powerfully guide how you spend your time, where you invest your energy, and which goals are truly yours—not borrowed from others.
In the next post, I’ll share a personal story about how tuning fork moments—each subtle but consistent—helped me reconnect with a deeper sense of direction and meaning in my life.
